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a Bulrovian fairy tale
adapted by Rick Walton
Once upon a time there lived a little old man and a little old woman in a house made of corn stalks. The little old man and the little old woman had a tall scarecrow named Turpie who always barked when anyone tried to eat the house.
One night when the little old man and the little old woman were fast asleep, flutter, flutter, flutter through the sky came the crows.
"We'll eat the corn house and steal the little old man and the little old woman," said the crows.
But Turpie saw them. "BARK BARK BARK BARK," he barked, and he frightened the crows away.
"That scarecrow Turpie barks so loudly that I can't sleep!" said the little old man. And the little old man took off Turpie's head and buried it in the root cellar.
The second night along came the crows, flutter, flutter, flutter through the sky.
"We'll eat the corn house and steal the little old man and the little old woman," they said.
But Turpie felt them coming. "KICK KICK KICK KICK," kicked Turpie against the corn house. The crows flew away.
But the little old man awoke and said, "That scarecrow Turpie kicks so loudly that I can't sleep!" And the little old man took off Turpie's legs and buried them in the root cellar.
The third night the crows came again, flutter, flutter, flutter through the sky.
"We'll eat the corn house and steal the little old man and the little old woman," said the crows.
But Turpie knew they were there. "CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP," clapped Turpie and frightened the crows away.
But the little old man awoke and said, "That scarecrow Turpie claps so loudly that I can't sleep!" And the little old man took off Turpie's arms and buried them in the root cellar.
On the fourth night the crows returned, flutter, flutter, flutter through the sky.
"We'll eat the corn house and steal the little old man and the little old woman," said the crows.
Turpie tried to bark, but there was no bark in him. He tried to kick, but there was no kick in him. He tried to clap, but there was no clap in him. There was nothing Turpie could do.
So the crows ate the little corn house and stole away the little old woman. But they didn't get the little old man, for when he heard the crows eating the little corn house, he buried himself in the root cellar.
The crows took the little old lady to their home. They put an ugly nose on her face. And they put a pointed hat on her head. Then they tied her to the trunk of their tree to scare away people.
Now the little old man was sorry when he dug himself out of the root cellar. He was sorry that his house had been eaten and that the little old woman was gone. And he was sorry that all that was left of Turpie was his trunk.
So out of the root cellar he dug Turpie's head, and his legs, and his arms, and he put them where they belonged, on Turpie's body.
Then the little old man climbed back into the root cellar where he buried his head in his arms and cried.
Now that Turpie had arms, he unhooked himself from his pole and climbed down. And now that he had legs, off he trotted to the home of the crows.
When he arrived he saw the little old lady tied to the tree trunk. He put his finger to his lips so she'd be quiet. Then he untied her and sent her on her way home.
Turpie then hung himself up on the tree trunk and waited.
That night, when the crows flew out the first thing they saw was...
Turpie! "BARK BARK BARK BARK!" he said.
The crows were so frightened they dropped down dead.
Turpie gathered them up and took them home.
And the next day the little old man and the little old lady had crow pie for dinner.
And the next night, Turpie was again on duty, hung on his pole, protecting the little old man and the little old lady, and their new corn house.
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