I Like to Sit on the Sun in the Dark, Staring at the Moon

Help find the cure

I Like to Sit on the Sun in the Dark, Staring at the Moon

by Rick Walton

I like to sit on the sun in the dark, staring at the moon.

I especially like the moon's stripes.

I like to roll up hills with a german shepherd tucked carefully in my back pocket.

Sometimes the german shepherd bites me and I cover him with mustard, stick him in a can...

...and send him to my uncle in Albany for dinner.

I like to sing the dictionary to the cats outside my window. They listen carefully, trying to learn the lyrics.

Then I sing the dictionary again and the cats sing along.

Commercial Break:

Don't you always hate commercials? Don't you hate how they always take you away from a story just when it's getting interesting? Yesterday I was watching this TV show about a martian who was lost in a subway and a gang of goldfish was after him, they wanted to gnaw him to death, and just before they caught him...

...the show was interrupted by a commercial for tooth soap, and I was so mad...

...that I picked up my television and flushed it down the toilet. Don't try this at home without your parents' permission.

So anyway, if you hate commercials, go buy a book. Now back to our regularly scheduled program.

I like to dance on elephants as they lumber through the forest. I spin and twirl and leap high in the air.

Sometimes the elephant grabs me with his trunk and throws me high into a tree...

...but I climb down, chase after the beast, climb back on and continue my dance.

I like to sleep in air pockets. I climb in, close the zipper, and listen to the whisperings of the flying zebras until I fall asleep.

I like to suddenly stop everything--the world, the sky, the sun, the moon, the stars--and think about life. About how it's spelled with four letters, and the last letter is an "e". And the "e" isn't pronounced. That fact always leaves me in wonder.

And then the thought that there are also an "l", an "i", and an "f" brings me to tears. I weep great drops of joy, drops that spill on my pants and shoes, drops that spread onto the ground and slowly cover the earth with water.

I weep as the tears reach my knees, and my waist, and my neck, then I swim to a tall tower and begin to think of something else until the tears dry up.

And then I realize that if you take the "f" out of life, you have a lie, and the seriousness of this fact shatters me and again brings tears, this time of sorrow, to my eyes.

Another Commercial Break:

Life, it's a bargain at twice the price.

I like to make doorknobs shakes at midnight when the moon is full. I sneak from house to house, quietly removing doorknobs until my hat is full of them.

Then I rush home, throw them all in the blender with a little ice cream and milk, and in no time, doorknob shakes.

I slowly drink the shake, enjoying every drop. It's a wonderful experience...

...but for an hour or so afterwards I always have a strong urge to open and close myself.

I like to think ahead while going backwards in time. I like to see cavemen in spacecraft.

I like to write books on the head of a pin. I make myself very, very small, so small that the head of the pin stretches out in all directions as far as I can see.

Then I take a very large pencil, and begin to write.

I like to do a lot of things.

But most of all, I like to kiss people who read books. SMACK!